Lately it feels like I have a ‘come to Jesus’ moment every day, and as exhausting as it is, I feel like I’m learning, growing, and developing more than I ever have before.

Essentially, I’ve had to look myself in the eye and actually work out what I want for my life, and what I’m willing to do to get it. If I’m not happy here, what am I going to change?

It’s tough because it makes you confront a lot of things in yourself. You have to really look at what you are setting for, what your habits are, and why you are subconsciously choosing to stay ‘here’. To be blatantly honest, I’ve realised that even though this isn’t my ideal life, I’m very comfortable where I am. After years of instability and unsafe environments, I have finally achieved a lot of the things which bring security.

First, I want to acknowledge that this is a good thing, and I’m proud of my ability to reach this stage. I have my first rental, I’ve got a stable full-time job, I finished my degree, I’ve published a couple of books, and I’m exploring so many new hobbies and interests. Now, as grateful as I am for all of this, there is still some gaps. I’ve never really had a big family or lots of connections to rely on, so I’d like to build this up. Then there is all the creative pursuits I’m enjoying at the moment, with some big goals.

Right now, I am as young and free as I will ever be, so I want to use this opportunity while I can. Sad as it is sometimes, it’s kind of freeing to not have many friends and family or a boyfriend to put down my efforts. I’m free to experiment and try new things almost without judgement.

As the saying goes, the best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago, the second-best time is today. I don’t want to delay anymore, because if I can plant the seeds for success now, my goodness its going to be fun in twenty years! 

I’ve been making a concerted effort recently to get my advice from older women. So often I’m bombarded with messages about how awful life is as a woman, and I’m tired of hearing all the ways I’m going to get old, tired, miserable, and fat. Is there any hope for enjoyment? I want to know, so I’ve been actively looking. I love seeing fabulous older women, dressed up however they want, sharing their wisdom for the rest of us. Unfortunately, so many of them express their regrets about not doing more of the things they wanted and not following their dreams.

Personally, I would like to avoid that horror story, so its time to get to work. I want to live a big and full life. I feel like there are so many things I’ve missed out on, and I don’t want that to be the case anymore if I can help it. There is so much opportunity out there, and I want to embrace it with open arms.